Encouragement · Parenting

Unhappy Life = Unhappy Wife? Unhappy Mom? Learning How to Become Content-No Matter What!

learn how to be content, wife mom

State of Discontentment

This world lives in a perpetual state of discontentment.  As women, it easy to feel sorry for ourselves as we compare our lives to others.

We may feel discontentment over lack of money, wanting finer home decor, failure on many different things, or being able to take that Disney vacation.

Women are naturally judgemental of each other.

We scrutinize each other with a fine-tooth comb looking for the good, bad, and ugly.

After we have taken in all in, then we internalize it.  And rarely are we just truly happy for each other.

Proverbs 14:30 A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bone

Why Do Women Do This?


*We want different clothes, house, car, vacations.

*Our husbands to change to become more like somebody elses husband who does something better. More leadership, make more money, spend more quality time with the family, and so on.

*We want to be the better mother, wife, friend, neighbor, church member, and so on.

*We want to be skinnier, prettier, stronger, more flexible, and so on.

Yet, none of these will make us truly happy in the end.  Happiness is fleeting.

Happiness is temporary based on situational happenstances.  What  made us happy ten minutes ago, will annoy us tomorrow.

We should not be basing our happiness on what we want, need, or have.  Our happiness should not come from possessions or people. We are called to be conent no matter what.

The Bible calls us to allow our convictions, not our circumstances, to govern our sense of contentmentTrue, biblical contentment is a conviction that Christ’s power, purpose and provision is sufficient for every circumstance. We are to learn how to walk through all kinds of adversity believing in and experiencing Christ’s sufficiency. We have to choose to rest on God’s good promises despite what may be going on in our live.  Author Rob Kuban


Being Content No Matter What…..

How can we be content no matter what, especially when everybody else has it better than we do?

This is really easy to answer. Nobody has it better than anybody else.

There is a phrase that goes like this, “ain’t nobody happy if my wife/mom ain’t happy.”   We may laugh at this and it may ring true for others.

But the sad reality is that an unhappy wife/mom is no reason for her family to become happy or suffer for the state of discontentment in her own life.  An unhappy wife or mom quickly becomes a nagging wife or mom.

Psalm 34:10b Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.

A nagging (discontent, argumentative, and nagging) wife or mother is annoying, like the constant dripping of a leaky roof during a rainstorm. (Proverbs 27:15) The Bible says it is better for a husband to live alone on a rooftop than to live with a (discontent, argumentative, and nagging) wife. (Proverbs 21:9).

Ladies, it is so important to have a peaceful home. Not one fraught with angst and turmoil, fueled by an unhappy woman.  Because let’s face, as the keepers of our home, we are instrumental to speaking life into our homes.

contentment wife mother

By cultivating a content heart, the joy and peace can prevail in our homes.

  1. Start with being thankful.
  2. Smile
  3. Stop and laugh at the little things that irritate you, don’t let it rob your of your happiness. John 14:27 (Amplified) says, “Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.”
  4. Count your blessings.  Literally, write them down.  Make a list. Add more to it daily.  It easy to find things to be grateful for. Make it a goal to find one thing daily to be joyful over.
  5. Serve other. Stop expecting to be served.  True happiness comes from serving others, not being served. The greatest example of this is Jesus. He came to serve us and still is.  There is no greater love than His love for us.
  6. Be appreciative.  This sounds similiar to being thankful, but it is different in a way because it can become the attitude of your heart.  You can appreciate all things that happen in your life, if you change the attitude of your heart.  Those little things that annoy you may be the greatest blessings at the moment.  Being stuck in traffic = extra time to pray. Broken down car = more time with family.
  7. Trust in God, know He is perfect, and His will for your life. He seeks to do good through you, if you just trust in Him.
  8. Perspective:  Realize that somebody’s mood, attitude, or actions need not cause you any unhappiness or discontment.  We are not responsible for how anybody else acts, but we are responsible for how we act, feel, or think.
  9. Love those precious moments with your family.  Make those your happy moments.
  10. Hold your family dear to your heart, pray for them, and love them like Christ does.
  11. The most important advice on becoming truly content is to focus on becoming more like Christ.  This is one by striving to serve Him.

learn how to be content

Learning how to be content is not going to be an overnight endeavor.  It is going to take practice.  Make it your goal to become more content as the keeper of your home, as a wife and mother,  and as a believer in Christ.

Pray over it. Ask the Lord to change your heart.   Pray that the Lord allows you become like Paul in Philippians when he made this remarkable claim:

“I have learned, in whatever circumstances I am, to be content. I know also how to be abased, and I know how to abound. In everything and in all things I have learned the secret both to be filled and to hunger, both to abound and to lack.”

Discontentment is a state of the soul, not a product of your circumstances.

Colossians 3:15 advises,  “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts…. and be thankful.”





Stephanie Malcolm,

Training Keepers of the Home

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