How to Encourage Your Child

How to Encourage Your Child

Most parents want what is best for their children.

However, not all parents are naturally encouraging or know how to bolster self-esteem and self-confidence in their children.

Children with loving and encouraging parents are more successful in jobs, marriages, careers, in parenting, and in their own faith walk with the Lord.

As parents it is our job to guide, teach, train, and encourage our children to do their best.

How can we do this?

Below are 17 ways to naturally bring out the best in our children.

Be Kind

Always be kind and gentle in how you speak and in your actions, even if you’re angry or frustrated.

Be respectful and practice forebearance.

Giving respect should not be based on whether or not a child deserves it. We give respect (even if we feel they do not deserve it), this is called forbearance. Treat your children the way you want to be treated.

Always support their effort.

Be supportive no matter how much or how little they accomplish. Nothing will motivate a child or spur a child on to good deeds than a parent who is sitting on the sidelines, being the cheerleader, and saying “I believe in you!”

Spend quality time with them.

Listen to your child.

What does your child talk about? What are they trying to tell you?

Learn how to become a better listener.

Be interested in what they are interested in.

When you show an interest in their abilities, passions, and life; you are telling your child, “I think you’re important. I care about you.”

Allow your child to learn

Provide opportunities for your child to grow in different areas. Perhaps, music or sports lessons, allow them to serve in a soup kitchen, have them work under a mentor in a trade they’re interested in. The greatest growth is often seen after new experiences and opportunities.

Allow them to make mistakes.

Have a reward system in place.

When you child knows what is expected (such as chores and responsiblities) and a system is in place that rewards them, it tends to be more motivating and encouraging for a child.

Set goals and expectations for them.

Give them the tools to achieve them. And allow them to make their own goals and make a list on how to achieve them.

Expect differences

And realize that success is different for every child. Don’t compare siblings with each other. God made each child differently. None of us are the same, expect differences in your children.

Praise and reward the good behavior.

No matter how small or trivial it may be, praise your child or teen when you catch them doing something good.

It shows the child that you are watching, paying attention, and it naturally encourages them to keep working hard.

Discipline them

Disciplince the bad, rebellious, and disrespectful behavior. Be consistent in your discipline.

Even though discipline seems negative, it teaches self-control and allows your child the opportunity to improve. This is often referred to as tough-love.

Boost their self esteem with positive statements.

Using words like “I knew that you would mess up again” or “why did you do that”only sets our children up for failure and shows how little we believe in them.

Choose your words very carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when you don’t love their behavior.

Be a good role model

Children learn from an early age how to act by watching us.

***Do you yell and get angry if things don’t go your way?

***Do you sulk, cry, or overreact in other situations?

By allowing your children to take cues from you, you are able to play a large role in their behavior and actions.

***Allow them to see you doing something nice for somebody, without expecting anything in return. And make sure that you are being a role model for the behaviors that you want to see in your children: kindness, gentleness, self control, patience, and so on.

Believe in them

This should be done from as early age as possible. Support their dreams and desires. Let them know that you will always have their back, even if things get tough. “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up” (1 Thessalonians 5:11).


This is the most important way to encourage your child. Pray for them. Pray with them. Teach them how to pray. Show them, tell them, and remind them how much the Lord loves them.

Our children need us to be a steady source of love and encouragement. The love and support from a parent can have a lasting positive impact on a child’s life.

Be blessed.

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